Repetitive Repeating Repeats

    The alarm clock goes off and the chimes just keep chiming in my ears. I move the switch to the off position and then fall back into bed, pull the covers back up, and resume my sleepy thoughts. Pillowing up the sheets and covers until I am completely surrounded, I start the morning argument in my head.

“Get up”
“Not! It’s warm here. I am not moving!”
“Get up. There are things to get done.”
“Didn’t you hear me before? No way! No no no! You are tired, pooped, exhausted, wiped out. What do
     you think you are doing getting out of that bed? You need to stay in.”
“I’m not tired, I just got 8 hours of sleep.”
“Tired, sleepy. Close your eyes and go to sleep. Just soak the heat in, cuddle up with the flannels and the
    pillows and the blankets.”
“Yaawwwwnnnnnn!!!! Maybe I am tired.”
“See, you just yawned – I told you you were tired!”
“No, I’m not tired. Stop that. I have to get up!”
   The argument generally goes on like this for a few minutes until I convince myself that I have to really get out of bed or start really running late for the day. What amazes me is that I really am telling myself over and over is that I’m tired. I just slept for hours! How could I possibly be tired? I’m not tired, I’m just not awake yet. And not being a morning person, that is saying something. It amazes me that the repetition in the conversation can just about convince me that I really am tired. There is enormous power in repetitive things in your mind, over and over. If I can convince myself that I am tired in just a few half awake moments, how tired will I be if that is what I tell myself over and over throughout the day?
   We all have little things that turn over in our minds. We must take the time and effort to acknowledge what is there and determine if it is something good or not. If not, we must change the pattern. Let’s repeat things over which involve being kind, capable, and loving. Let’s repeat ideas of mercy and gratitude. Take charge of your thoughts and that is a repetitive power indeed.

Healing

I noticed a few days ago, that I am healing. I had a bad leg injury several months ago, which left me couch bound and hobbling for quite some time. What happened? Well….

September of last year, I was in Ottawa and fell on a cobblestone sidewalk. Falling, and finding myself having a much closer view of the concrete than I had wished for, I pushed myself back up and found a low wall to sit on. Breathe in, breathe out, that is all I concentrated on for a few minutes. Finally, I steeled myself to look at the ankle which was apparently confusing itself with a golf ball holder. I made it back to Iowa wearing a borrowed ankle boot protector thing.
Physical therapy, a different boot, and very flat shoes followed. But, just this last week after walking about five miles, I was sore the next few days. I could feel the muscles complaining. Complaining, but not injured, a little sore but not debilitated. It was a realization which hit me again, my leg is healing!
From pain that took my breath away and led the world to dim before my eyes to a small complaint, it didn’t occur overnight but it did occur. Healing from bad sprains (I won’t go into the more gross injury parts), healing from emotional hurts, from hopes that have been dashed or plans that have been crashed, healing does occur. It is not quick, not overnight, but gradually one day – you realize that you just walked five miles and feel great!