Monday, January 18, 2010

The Turn of a Dirty Phrase

Have you ever heard of a dirty phrase?  No, not dirty as in foul language, or dirty as in dealing with dirt or muddy earth, but more of a psychological approach.  Think of the following sentence…
I would really like to come, but…. 
I care about this, but…
I love them, but…
It is the but in the sentence that makes this a dirty phrase, a turn on the meaning to go backwards.  It may truly be thought and felt this way, as we humans are a very confusing dichotomy of twists and turns.  We are capable of looking at something and having two different reactions come forward.
I would really love to come, but I have to work. 
I would really love to come, but I’m going to take the night off.
I would really love to come, but I don’t know anybody in that crowd.
Each of these convey a sense of division, with varying degrees of really loving to come. 
It’s one thing to have a dirty phrase dealing with scheduling or explaining the top priorities I have.  Is this different though when I’m talking about something that is supposed to be absolute?  Mark 12 tells me that the most important commandment is to “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength,” (Mark 12:29-30).  So, what if I say I love you God, but I just can’t do this with all that I am.  We all feel that way sometimes, I know I certainly do! 
The one that I think that I am the most guilty of actively having in my life is the next commandment down, the second part of that thought in Mark 12; “Love your neighbor as yourself.”  Though normal is not something I aspire to, I would imagine that I am normal in not everyone is my favorite person.  Thinking back over my life thus far, I can think of people who I really was not too fond of.  In those cases, I may have said and certainly had the attitude of yes, I’m supposed to love this person, but I don’t really want to.  I mean, have you heard what they did to me or someone I care about?  I can think of some people in my life that I really did have that attitude towards, the attitude of a dirty phrase. 
This attitude is one that I am realizing is dangerous for me.  If I give myself mental and emotional permission to include this attitude, then I am basically saying that I can sin against this commandment.  It’s not an obvious one, at least at first.  It takes time for the attitude to gather speed and come charging towards me full speed. 
I must be conscious of my attitude, and make sure that I’m not turning any dirty phrases.  

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