Wednesday, November 3, 2010

taerT ro kcirT

   What a great night for taerT ro kcirT. Never heard of it? Well, we were just having too much fun away from the house on the night when all of the cute little beggars come out for candy. So, when we returned, there was no candy to give. The general discussion as the house was being approached was, “make a dash for the door”, “get everything you need now,” “don’t make eye contact and Hurry!” It was a mad dash with giggles all the way. There were a few persistent door ringers and knockers even though the lights were turned out. So, the concept was born, a backwards trick or treat – rather a taerT ro kcirT! The trick-or-treater approaches the door. But, when they are about to knock, we knock from inside and start yelling trick or treat. Then, we open the door and they give us candy. Sounds like a great plan to me! Candy, candy coming to me, I don’t even have to put on my shoes to go out! Okay, so obviously the kids aren’t going to go for it. But, you can’t blame a girl for trying.
   I started wondering what else we do that for in life, where do we have it backwards. What else do we approach, only to have someone inside the door take instead of give? Perhaps you have been in a taerT ro kcirT relationship with someone, be it a professional or friend or family relationship. It is essential to have not only good boundaries, but to also be ready to give instead of take. You see, we can be on both sides of the door any given day. We can be the one who is intending to receive the gift, and end up being the giver instead. Boundaries are essential to know your role, otherwise we can become confused and just start approaching random houses with our candy – having it taken away from us, rather than being shared with. No matter where relationships occur, they are quite difficult. They are messy, confusing, and at times just frustrating. They can also be rewarding, gratifying, and encouraging. But, think of successful relationships that you have witnessed. The roles are understood, and both give and both receive.
   I don’t think we will be seeing a taerT ro kcirT trend starting anytime soon, at least with candy. But, I hope that we do become more aware of how we may indeed be stealing someone else’s candy from the wrong side of the door.